Wednesday, May 4, 2011

Musing (2)

So...there's this guy. I've known him a few years. We're off and on type friends; family friends too. We run in entirely different circles. If you saw us standing next to each other you'd think we didn't even know each other, much less for long. He looks good though. He's got a little cockiness about him that I dig, and even though I rarely ask his advice, when I do, he gives it to me straight with no niceties. Sometimes, he even cusses me out when he thinks I'm not living up to my potential.

He's a guilty pleasure; an idea that I toy around with on warm summer nights while mulling over calling him or not. And on days like today when my hormones are all out of balance I have to remind myself that there's a distinct difference between a need and a want. Don't let the angelic face fool you, cause I surely do want.

Cravings are usually for things that aren't typically healthy. You know, sugar, super salty, fried things. Think fried chicken with macaroni and cheese followed by fried Snickers bars in a candy coated cake. Cravings are for things you typically don't have but have been known to partake of. My question do you curb them?

I know. Yesterday I was all "power to the virgins!" and now I'm all hot under the collar. Don't misunderstand, I'm not saying it's a sucky gig; it's a lot less things for me to worry about as a virgin than a non-virgin. What I am saying is it gets confusing and tough when I feel this way. Confusing because I don't understand how my body's telling me to go out and try something I've never tried and just hope for the best and tough because this is not the first, nor the last time I'm going to feel this way and knowing that makes me just want to lie prostrate on a cool floor for a long time. What's a girl to do on such days (or nights) when all this crazy hormone-induced salaciousness takes over? How do you deny it?

 Lord, be a chastity belt. <3


Im said...

you have to "self soothe"


Tes said...

Oddly enough, that does not make me feel better. lmao

Im said...

are you "self soothing" to completion?