After that I got a little obsessed. I found the producer (the often imitated but never duplicated Jay Dee), and the band (the Pharcyde). The song was called Runnin'. Later on once the dopeness of the song rendered me able to search more, I found that the snippets Jay Dee used were from a Stan Getz song Saudade Vem Correndo and fell in love with that too. So now I have five versions of essentially the same song on my iPod.
In any case, what does this say about me
I'm always, always running. Not in the literal sense,
I'm afraid to be myself. I'm afraid to go out in the world and fail. So I'm always running to my parents, my friends, even sometimes deeper within myself to shield myself from what I see as a big bad world out there just waiting to tear me to pieces. Over time though I have realized that I can't keep running opposite of what I want, or else, how am I ever supposed to get there? I take smaller steps back in the direction of "right" instead of running paces back in the direction of "safe," but sometimes I worry that those small steps don't matter to those around me, or even in the scheme of things with the way people treat them like a "It's about damn time" type thing instead of a "Congratulations, keep going," type thing. Should it matter what they think anyway?
The music is pensive and thoughtful but complexly layered, things I've been called on more than one occassion. The lyrics are meaningful and relate to everybody, again, a lot like me. It has roots deep in different cultures and an infectious loop that makes you want to delve deeper into why you are who you are, why you think what you think, and why you keep running which is exactly why this song defines a big portion of who I am.